Oh. My. Goodness.

A prize to the person who finds the most mistakes in this comment that I found written in response to an article in the Deseret News.  Is it the curse of being an English teacher or is it just me?  Please, please, PLEASE tell me this is just a punctuation/capitalization/usage satire or I think I'll quit my job FOREVER!  And then there's the content.  And the grammar.  And, the announcement to everyone and their dog that he's a Mormon, to boot!  

Help me, Rhonda. 

"It's LDS Church leaders that strongly urge "moderate" (that's a liberal term by the way), approach to illegal immigration reform, not all Church Member's and American Citizen's. I refuse too participate with that thinking. Utah must obey all the written law's of the land and "NEVER" ever adopt a phony illegal humane approach to this reality, reflecting on their culture, history and spirit of inclusion. Right now Utah don't respect the rule of law and support law enforcement's professional judgment and discretion. They try to turn "federal code's" into minor State civil violations stuffed into Bill's in Congress along with earmarks and pork. while they oppose policies that unnecessarily separate families and deport the parent's, when they have the right to take their "welfare kid's" along with them. Utah don't really acknowledge the non-economic role illegal immigrants play while real American workers and taxpayers pay for while they are here. That's my view, like it or not. And I'm a Mormon also. Plus a true conservative that does not hide the truth's."